i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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