We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize