i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
