I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
