dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
