Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
