If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
