I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
