2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
