I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize