How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
