i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
