I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
