Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
