I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Randomize
