Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
