I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
