We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
