hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
well you can't waste a boner
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
