Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Please, let me fuck your mom
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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