he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize