I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
