so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
