When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
