My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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