i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
