I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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