Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
We had to coat check the pizza.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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