I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
