So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
