new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
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