Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
