My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
