Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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