Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize