shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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