We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
