I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
