and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
