Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
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