dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
