There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
