its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
