Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
