You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
