Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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