There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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