Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
