How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
