The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
